Lesson from The Bachelorette: The Follow-Up

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I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: Job hunting is a lot like dating.

There really should be a reality show about this. Wait, there is – The Bachelorette.  It’s the ultimate interview experience.

What a train wreck. I can’t imagine putting myself through such a dating fiasco in front of millions. Yet there are so many lessons to be learned from this show that relate to the job search.

Yes, I’m serious. 

Everything from first impressions to thirty-second “Tell me about yourself” speeches to dress-for-success stories to having questions to ask the hiring manager.

Or in this case the bachelorette.

This week’s lesson from The Bachelorette is called The Follow Up.  It’s something many of us struggle with after we apply for a job.

Let’s say we have a great interview; we feel good about our conversation with the hiring manager; we had a real “connection” and we think we’re going to get an offer. Suffice it to say we leave the interview feeling pumped.

How or when do we follow-up with the hiring manager after an interview? 

Hopefully we do not take our cue from one of the current Bachelorette contestants, an overly confident bachelor who does not understand the rules when it comes to dating on the reality show.

This particular gentleman, having made a connection during an earlier date with the Bachelorette, decided that during the group date he no longer needed to pursue the young lady.  He reasoned that if she really liked him, she could “make an effort to find him”.

Unfortunately for him, that’s not how the game works.

The show is about courting the Bachelorette.  She holds all of the power to “hire” or “fire” the participants. The men are supposed to be in constant pursuit, proclaiming their intentions, while she is not allowed to proclaim her intentions until she chooses (hires) a winner.

No way was she going say “You’re hired” with the customary red rose given to the bachelors who advance to the next round.

Doesn’t this sound a lot like the interview process? 

In the real world, the hiring manager holds all the power.  As candidates we are in constant pursuit, proclaiming our desire to work for the company and touting our capabilities until a candidate is selected.

No matter how great you feel about the interview, no matter what kind of electric vibes you may have received from the hiring manager, it is always up to the candidate to continue to pursue the job opportunity.

Never take the attitude, “They liked me, so now they can call me”.

Unless you don’t want the job.

The day of the interview send thank-you emails to everyone you’ve met, followed by hand-written thank-you notes post-marked that night.

Wait a few days and if you haven’t heard anything, contact the hiring manager again with a friendly email or call reiterating your desire to work for her and the company.

After another week, try again.  Just remember that too much communication is as bad as too little. It’s a fine line between showing interest and being a pest.

True, you can have the best interview and feel a great connection with the hiring manager and still not get the job.  If that happens, you will have the satisfaction of knowing that you gave it your best shot.

Who knows? You may demonstrate the kind of attitude that will get you an offer. And maybe a rose.

Her Name Was Velma

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We never knew her by name, but we saw her every Sunday. She was our last point of contact as we left Sam’s after our weekly shopping trip.

She recognized us too, knowing that we would always have at least one rotisserie chicken in our cart, possibly some paper products, dog treats and maybe a couple of other items.

She must have thought we really like chicken; how could she know that our senior dog benefitted the most from this purchase?

Taking our receipt, she would carefully count the items in our cart and compare it to the receipt. If I had to write her job description, it would be “Part security detail, part customer service, part exit greeter”.

“Exit Greeter” – seems like an oxymoron, yet since her smile and words were our last point of contact with Sam’s during each trip, she could literally make or break our shopping experience.

She was friendly with those who followed the rules, even exchanging pleasantries. But woe to the person who tried to sneak an “extra” item out of the store! This was her station, her job, and she would not let you pass by.

Last Sunday was different.  Our “Exit Greeter” was not at her usual station.   Instead, there was a bouquet of flowers, with her photo and a brief obituary.

Hubby and I found ourselves all at once shocked and saddened to learn that someone we didn’t really know at all had passed away.

Other customers in line felt the same, all asking where she was, then realizing what happened when they saw the bouquet and announcement.  We all asked questions, such as “What happened?” “Was she sick?” “She was so young!”

Her name was Velma.  And she made more of an impact on customers than she probably ever knew.

We – the public; the media; society in general – tend to turn up our noses at jobs that we perceive to be low-level, those that we deem “beneath us” or “without much value”.  Such as the “Exit Greeter” at Sam’s Club.  There are jokes about greeters at Walmart.

We brush off these perceived low-level jobs, giving little thought to what we might do without those workers.

Yet without these jobs – and the people who take pride in them – our customer experience, and our lives, may not be as rich.

As we shoot for the moon in our careers, sometimes we forget that all jobs have value and are important. We are hesitant to accept a title that’s not as impressive as we want, or pay that may be lower than we are accustomed to, especially if we are re-entering the work force after a layoff.

Some of us refuse to consider companies that don’t meet our rigid requirements.  Some of us will risk financial hardship rather than take a job that may appear entry-level.

We have forgotten that all jobs have value; a job is what we make of it and we are missing opportunities to impact the lives of others, as well as to better ourselves.

All of us – experienced workers and recent college grads – remember: no matter what your position is within the company, do it with pride. You never know what kind of impact you might have on people. 

And if you desire to move up the corporate ladder, this may be your first step on your way to success.

As for Hubby and I, we will continue to shop at Sam’s and I’m sure there will be another Exit Greeter to see us out the door.

But it won’t be the same without Velma.

Girl Power

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This post first appeared in May of 2013, and I wanted to run it again to remind us of the importance of building not only our business networks but also our personal support systems.  We need to support each other as we build our careers or search for jobs! 

 

One of the benefits of being an author is that I get invited to speak at different groups and events.  And that means I get to meet new people – always a plus for a social person like me.  It’s especially good if there’s food involved; bonus points if there’s chocolate.

Recently I had the opportunity to meet a wonderful group of women who are part of an organization designed specifically to support local business women.  They meet regularly to talk about business issues in general as well as those specific to women.  They want to empower themselves and other women through constant learning and growing.

During my time with them, we focused on reinventing yourself in your career.  It was a wonderfully engaging conversation.  We talked about almost everything: our careers, the economy, even shoes.  It’s a universal rule: whenever two are more women are gathered, there will be a discussion at some point about shoes.

This was “Girl-Power” at its finest.  Or whatever you call it now that we are adults.

Although I was the guest speaker, I felt immediately like part of the group. The chatter flowed effortlessly as though we had been friends for years.   And I was reminded about the importance of supporting our friends and colleagues as we journey through our business lives.

Last week I wrote about neglect as it pertains to our resumes and interview skills.  This meeting reminded me that we also need to keep our friendships thriving – both personal friendships as well as business acquaintances.

This is beyond networking; this is a support system.  And it’s vital to our career growth.

I, for one, am guilty of neglecting my support system.  Not talking about family here.  Hubby looks wounded, like he’s been kicked off my support team.  He is my rock, and always will be.  It’s just that everyone – women and men – need a business support system outside of the family.   People who are objective third parties.

This group of women reminded me that I need to make my support system a priority, although that’s easier said than done. We’re all busy, and adding one more thing to the schedule seems like a monumental task.  It’s important for me to do this so I can continue to grow in my career and as a person.

I sure don’t want to wait until a layoff or I’m desperate to begin a job search to try and round up my friends and colleagues.  Yikes.  That would be like asking friends to come to my wedding at the last minute.

To my Girl Power friends out there, I’m sorry I’ve neglected you.  It’s about time we re-grouped for a friendly networking event.  If I’m in charge, there will be lots of food and plenty of beverages – and definitely chocolate.

And don’t forget to put your best foot forward – shoes will be the first topic on the agenda.

The Five Minute Resume Update

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When was the last time you updated your resume?

Some of us keep an always-updated resume close at hand. Many of us – more than likely, the majority of us – update only on occasion, usually when we need the resume for a job interview.

Updating a resume can be time consuming.  In our busy lives, who has time to creatively weave a great one or two page document about our achievements?  It’s not something that any of us truly like to do either.

“If we could only find time, then we would update our resumes”, we tell ourselves.  Somehow I don’t believe us.

What’s the old saying: How do you boil the ocean? One cup at a time.

For anyone who has not updated their resume in at least a year, all it takes is five minutes to make a quick review and resume update.

The Five Minute Resume Update

  1. Review the top of your resume, including your name and contact information. Your name should be in larger font than the rest of the information. Remove your street address; include city and state only. List one phone number; no need to label it as “Cell” or “Home”. Be sure to include any social media links such as LinkedIn or your website.
  2. Review your opening statement. If it still says something like “Seeking a position as….” time for a change. This statement should tell the reader who you are and what you want to do. Example: Marketing Director with proven success integrating social media and traditional marketing campaigns to drive consumer traffic.
  3. Review the end of your resume. Remove any reference to college GPA and related activities, personal factoids, including hobbies or family information, and the phrase “references available upon request”. If you are forty or older, time to remove college graduation dates as well.

That’s it; The Five Minute Resume Update. It’s not an overhaul by any means. But it gets us started and moving in the right direction.

Always Bring Your A-Game to Every Interview

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What would you do if you knew, for certain, that you had a shot at a job that would pay you seven figures?  That you were a shoe-in for an opportunity that would make you an instant millionaire?

All you had to do was get through the final interview without screwing up.  Basically, the job was yours to lose.

Most of us, I assume, would do everything in our power to bring our A-game.  We would prepare like never before. We would know our thirty-second “Tell me about yourself,” elevator speech. We would practice our answers to interview questions.  We might even hire a coach to review basics like eye-contact, body language, conversation and dressing for success.

Personally, I would purchase a new outfit, get my hair cut and have a manicure. This would definitely be a legitimate reason to shop.

Yes, most of us would go “all-out” for such an opportunity, knowing that getting hired would be the ultimate achievement and would cover any expenses we incurred to put our best foot forward.

I recently read an article written by Rick Gosselin of the Dallas Morning News about a young man who did the opposite. He had an opportunity to be an instant millionaire and let it go up in smoke. Literally.

The article had to do with the NFL draft, something that I don’t usually watch.  Hubby brought the article to my attention about the story of Randy Gregory, apparently one of the nation’s top players and at one time expected to be a first round draft pick; probably top ten.

It’s my understanding that “first round” means millions of dollars, much more than if you languish until a later round.

But Mr. Gregory blew the biggest job interview of his life at the NFL combine.  He tested positive for marijuana.  I like how Mr. Gosselin put it best:

“By testing positive for marijuana, Gregory failed that simple intelligence test. How can you be that stupid as to risk a  lifetime of financial security for a few tokes off a joint?”

Seriously, did this young man really think his talent was so special that he was immune from the rules that all other draft hopefuls had to follow?  That coaches were going to ignore bad interview performance and pay him millions anyway?

The Cowboys had him as a first round pick, yet passed him up.  So did the other teams.  Mr. Gregory sat waiting for an offer.  I hope he was nervous; he should have been.

Something similar could happen to anyone during a job interview.  Inappropriate remarks, unable to answer interview questions, appearing unprepared in general, appearing cocky, inappropriate interview attire, etc. – any number of things.  We could just be so nervous that we lose our ability to think clearly.

Every time we interview, whether it’s the first phone-screen or the final-round in-person interview, we simply must bring our A-game. Always be on your toes.  Always show the company the best you have to offer. Your goal is to get the offer, not to leave a lucrative deal on the table because of a mistake.

As for Mr. Gregory, eventually he was selected, yet his value had diminished.  Trust had been lost, the team was wary of what he could do on the field as well as if hiring him could damage their brand.

I hope it works out for him.  And I hope we can all remember the lesson he inadvertently shared: Always bring your A-game to every interview. It could mean big bucks.

When It Comes To Interviewing, Just Be Yourself

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Bruce Jenner.  Unless you’ve been living in a cave, no doubt you’ve heard or seen or read about his decision to start living the life he has always wanted to live.

He’s finally going to start being true to himself rather than trying to simply fit in.  

While his case is an extreme, really don’t we all play a little bit of a game when it comes to being true to ourselves?

Especially at interview time.  Sometimes we paint a picture or act in ways that might be just a tad bit different from the person we actually are, instead of simply being ourselves.

Maybe we’ve been out of work for quite some time and we need the money that comes with the job.  Maybe it’s our “dream” company and we would do anything to get our foot in the door.  Maybe we are super excited about the actual work that comes with this particular job.

Whatever the case, we may do our best to fit in; to act a certain way during the interview process to secure an offer.

Nothing bad, mind you, it’s just that we may say or do things that are not exactly in line with our personality.  Or we may ignore little “red flags” that say “Your personality would not fit in with this corporate culture”.

Take me, for example.  I’m a very straight-forward, get-the-job-done kind of person.  I succeed in an environment that allows me to lead my team, to make decisions and to move the work forward.  An assertive leader, it’s my opinion that the best way to succeed is to understand the situation, set goals, formulate a strategy to achieve those goals and execute the tactics, knowing that there will be changes along the way.  I enjoy working with a strong, assertive leader as well; someone who will not hide from tough decisions or conversations.  And they’ve got to have a good sense of humor; I love to have fun at work too.

What if I ignored these known facts about myself during an interview?  What if pretended that instead, I was a bit more laid back and was okay with not having answers?  Or if I somehow knew that my assertive leadership capabilities would not be appreciated, and the corporate culture preferred a more easy-come, easy-go approach? Or any sense of humor would fall on deaf ears?

At best I would sit in silent frustration.  At worst, both the company and I would realize that while we both desired to do good work, our methods of achieving the outcome would be dramatically different.

It would mean that I was not being true to myself from the beginning, just to get the job.

I’ve said before that job hunting is a lot like dating.  And successful dating means being yourself; allowing the other person to see the real you in order to make an informed decision.

Same thing for accepting a job.  Just because it’s your “dream company”, if you have to suppress your personality during the interview or when you arrive for work, it probably is not a good fit long-term.

Right now, if you haven’t done this already, think about who you are.  The real you; your good qualities and bad; how you interact with people and how you work.  List them out.  Think about how this fits into a corporation’s culture.  (This is not to say we can’t include areas for self-improvement – I’ve got a list of those too.  Yet for this moment, know where you stand.)

When it comes to interviewing, just be yourself.  You owe it to yourself and to your employer.  Your success depends on it.

Decision Time: What To Do With Multiple Job Offers

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You’ve been interviewing for months with what seems likes a zillion companies and now it looks like you are a final candidate for two great positions.  You’ve got your fingers and toes crossed that one of them turns into a bona-fide offer of employment.

Both jobs are interesting, both offer similar types of work and both are located in the same area of town so the commute will be good.  It appears that both have a great corporate culture and you clicked with the hiring manager as well as team members.  No red flags that you have identified.

In other words, either would be a good job.

What’s the old saying? “When it rains, it pours.” Much to your surprise, BOTH companies make you an offer!

Once you’ve calmed down after high-fiving everyone in the neighborhood, at the grocery store and at the gym, reality comes crashing in.  How do you decide what to do with multiple job offers?  Especially since both companies are pretty much offering the same opportunity.

Wait; they aren’t.  One company is offering a much greater compensation package then the other one. Higher salary, signing bonus and other perks.

So what’s a job seeker to do?

If – and this is a big IF – both offers are truly apples-to-apples, then higher compensation may win out.

But rarely are two offers truly an apples-to-apples comparison.  There are usually a few differences that need to be looked at closely to help determine which job is the right job at this particular point in your career.

Deciding on an offer is different for every job seeker.  Certain things may be more important to me than they are to you, so we each need to decide for ourselves.

Here are a few ways to help:

  • Know what’s important to you.  Prior to a job search, write down your top ten career goals.  Do the same thing for your personal life (lifestyle goals).  See how those two lists intersect.  You want to make sure the job allows you to fulfill some of your lifestyle goals; if it doesn’t you will not be happy in the long run.  (If you did not do this exercise prior to job search, do it now.)
  • What are you trying to accomplish with this new job?  Is it learning a new skill and moving up in the company?  Job stability?  Benefits? Is it all about the cash?  Answering those questions will help you make an informed decision because one company will probably fulfill your needs better than the other.
  • Know Your Strengths. Hopefully you only interviewed for jobs that played to your strengths. Sometimes, though, we discover during the interview process that the job has more layers to it and maybe it’s not exactly as outlined in the job description. Make sure the job you choose really does match your strengths.
  • Stage in Life.  If you’re a new college graduate with few responsibilities, it’s much easier to take a job that requires long hours and lots of travel than someone with a family.  If you’re nearing retirement you may trade off salary for work that is more personally fulfilling.  Again, the “career goals vs. lifestyle goals” exercise comes in handy here.

Above all, put everything together. Remember the people you met, the corporate culture, the feeling you had when you left the interview, and how you feel now about the job itself.  If the compensation packages were equal, which one gets you most excited?

Again, deciding on a job offer is different for each person.  No matter what, don’t get so bogged down in the minutia of decision making that it takes the fun out of the moment.  Remember how great it is to have even one offer, much less multiple offers!

Five Career Moves I Would Make All Over Again

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Apparently I’ve reached the point in my career where I can “look back”.  How do I know this?  People younger than me ask for advice, such as “What was your biggest career mistake?” or “What do you wish you had done differently?”

My first instinct is to tell them, “Hey, I’m still in the game and playing well, thank-you-very-much!”

But I know what they mean.  Their intention is good and of course we all want to learn from those who have “Been There, Done That.”

I’m going to answer their question in a slightly different way. Here are Five Career Moves I Would Make All Over Again.

  • Go to Grad School. One of the best decisions of my life, although at the time it was an escape from a poor career choice.  Little did I realize how much better prepared I would be for the business world, armed with a couple of years of work experience plus an MBA.   In more recent years my MBA has served me well when applying for jobs when most companies say “Bachelors degree required, masters preferred”.  It knocks down that barrier to entry.

 

  • Follow My Passion. There’s truth to the saying, “Do what you love and the money will follow”. It may take a few extra years for the money to catch up, although being happy at work is priceless. It was hard to buck the trend of going with a high-paying job out of grad school in order to follow my dream, yet I have never looked back.  It’s been an awesome ride.

 

  • Be Uncomfortable. At one time I was convinced that I must follow a certain trajectory straight to the top of the corporate ladder. Then a VP at another company offered me a job in event marketing, something totally out of left field.  I remember thinking this was a pivotal moment: stay in a job where you are comfortable or move to something totally new and uncomfortable. I took the job and discovered a new skill set and passion for work that led me to bigger and better things.  All because I allowed myself to be uncomfortable.

 

  • Do Something Stupid. There was the time when I accepted a job pretty much for the money.  While it sounded good on paper, there was a nagging voice in my head that said “This job isn’t right for you”. Then the company threw a large compensation package my way.  It was, literally, too good to pass up and I took the bait. Despite my mistake, it was worth the move because I have no regrets, no “What if I had tried for the big payday?”  And I learned a valuable lesson – listen to your inner voice.

 

  • Continue to Learn. When Facebook and Twitter burst onto the scene, I was one of the first at my company to log on and learn about these new applications.  Why? Because we needed to use them and it would be good for me to “own” this in my department. I continue to try new technologies and applications as they appear, even if I don’t use them regularly.  They apply to my line of work and it’s important to stay educated – especially if you want to change jobs.

There you have it; Five Career Moves I Would Make All Over Again.  This list is not complete by any means.  Hopefully it helps you think about what kind of effort you put into your career, or gets you thinking about which way you want to go.

In ten, twenty, thirty years, what will you look back on and say, “I would do that all over again?”

Never Stop Learning

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This was it; final exam time.  My nerves were on edge.

“The test will begin the minute you access the exam link.  Remember it is a timed-test. You must complete the entire exam.  You may reference your textbook and notes. Don’t forget to submit the required course work exercises along with your written exam.  Good Luck!”

I could almost see the instructor staring at me; hear the heels of her shoes as she walked around the room.  Except this was a virtual course, taken online.  My first time at such an experience.

For those who have done this before, maybe it comes easier with experience. I found it difficult to pay attention to online lectures, with my mind drifting to a million other things.

Like, “Why is she wearing that dress; it’s sort of formal?” and “What kind of plant is that in the background?”

Now it was the “Final Frontier”; the exam. I began sweating profusely.  My throat was dry; my hand shook as I clicked “Begin” on my computer.

Not sure why this test was giving me the heebie-jeebies.

Let’s see: could it be that it’s been years since I’ve taken a test? That this is the FIRST and ONLY test for the course?  That my 3-ring binder with the course materials measured 4” thick?

Did I mention that there were close to 100 questions, all of them essay or short answer?

Augh!  The pressure!

Panic set in as a read the first question and tried to answer it without referring to the text.

Like a stubborn toddler I kept thinking, “I can do this myself”.

It only took a few minutes for me to see the beauty of referencing the text and I was off and running. Suddenly I relaxed and it was like I was back in college doing what I have always succeeded at: taking classes and passing exams. Learning.

Yes, I enjoy taking classes and learning new things.  Once I get the hang of it, I don’t even mind the testing.  Well, I’d rather not but it comes with the territory.

I’m not gonna lie; the exam was intense.  It took several full days to complete, and another to review my answers.

I returned my exam and the required course work before the deadline, confident in my answers.

Like I said, it had been years since I had taken an exam, much less taken a course.  This was long-overdue. My guess is that it’s been a long time since many of you have taken a course to learn something new.

How many of us stop learning when we leave school? How many excuses do we have?

  • “I’m too busy with work”
  • “It costs money to take classes”
  • “I’ve already learned what I need to know”
  • “If the company wants me to learn something, they can provide training”
  • “I’M TOO OLD”

We should never stop learning.  Why limit ourselves?  Learning is good for our brains; it’s stimulating; it can add credentials to our resume. If we attend classes at a local college we might even meet new people to add to our network.

In my case, I wanted to get formal training in a new discipline and earn the necessary credentials.

Did I pass the exam?  Keep your fingers crossed.  We’ll soon find out, won’t we?

Dishes and Other Monotony

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Cook Food. Eat. Do the dishes. Repeat.

It’s a never ending cycle, isn’t it?

Recently I had the opportunity to write for one of my favorite online magazines, MOMEO.  Whether you work from home or not, I’m sure many of you can relate to my post titled, “Dishes: Round 17: The Work At Home Journey By @It’sJustTami”.

Check it out here, at momeo.com

I’ll be back next week with more to share.

In the meantime, pop over to MOMEO, read my post and more.

Enjoy!