Do I Know You?

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Businessman Giving out Card 

I stare at the face on the screen, my brain searching for any memory of this person.  For the umpteenth time I look at the name, still not remembering anything. 

The face stares back.  It’s a great picture of this person, dressed in business attire, not a candid shot taken at a party with some questionable activities going on.  I mean, we all love a good party but those “beer-bucket-on-the-head” photos may not be as funny years from now.

Surely we must have been friends, or colleagues, or at the very least acquaintances at some point in my life.  Why else would someone want to connect with me on social media?

I scroll down to read any information about this person.  Didn’t go to school together, their career seems a bit different than mine.  Ah-ha!  There it is; years ago we both worked at the same company.   

Yet I still have no idea who you are.

Probably due to the fact that while we were both employed by the same company, this person worked in a different city than I did. And to my knowledge we never even attended a meeting together. 

Seems like I’m getting more of these random requests from people I don’t know, with no explanation in the note as to why they are reaching out to me.  Am I the only one who thinks we should have at least some knowledge of the people we connect with online? 

Perhaps you think I’m conservative.  Or maybe you’re thinking that I just “don’t get” social media.  As an early adopter of LinkedIn, Facebook, Twitter and Pinterest, I’m pretty sure I understand the concept. 

I’ll be the first one to tout the virtues of these platforms, especially LinkedIn and Facebook.   They are great ways to maintain and build your business network, as well as reconnect with friends and family socially. 

In fact, I’m forever preaching the benefits of LinkedIn to those who are in a job search, and I’m amazed when I discover that many have not made use of this platform.

That said, I think we need to remember that social networking is not a high school popularity contest.  There’s no prize for the most connections.  The Great Social Media Gods are not keeping tally.  More isn’t necessarily better.

I’m sure I have hurt some feelings when rejecting “friend” requests on Facebook, preferring to truly be friends with someone before allowing them in.   Radical concept, I know.

For LinkedIn, I can see the value in relaxing the standards since I’m not sharing details of my weekend or the fabulous pair of shoes I just picked up at the mall.

Yet I still see the need to use some discretion on this platform.

This person whose photo I’m looking at is probably very nice.  My assumption is that they are trying to find a job as it appears they are out of work, although I have no idea since they did not include an explanation in the connection request.

My challenge is that even if I connect with you, I don’t KNOW you.  And that means I’m not comfortable either connecting you with others or sending your resume to HR because, again, I don’t KNOW you. 

Did you really manage everything alone, as your profile indicates, or were you part of a team?  How about your people skills? I need to know about those too.

True networking is getting to know people so they have at least some knowledge of your personality and abilities.  It’s not about finding any and all who worked at the same company, or worse, just randomly trying to connect so you can brag to your friends about your huge network.

My apologies to this nice-looking person, but I’m denying your request.  If you feel strongly that we should connect, please send me a note with some sort of introduction or explanation.  

I, too, want to have great connections.  I’m just not in it to win a popularity contest.

Ready, Set, Action! Searching for a New Job

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What’s the most important part about searching for a new job? 

A.      A fabulous resume

B.      Confidence in your abilities

C.      Making a connection with the interviewer

D.      Wearing the right clothes

I’m sure you’re thinking that if the clothes make the woman, then the answer must be D.  While nothing makes me happier than rockin’ a new outfit, it’s not the right answer here.  This is a trick question; none of the answers are correct.

The most important part of a job search is actually applying for a job!  It’s taking action to get a reaction.   Sounds simple, right?  If so, when was the last time you took positive action and sent out a resume?  While you still had a job?  Hmmm?

We all reach a point in our careers where we are curious to see what else is out there.  It could be that we’re tired of our current situation, bored with our work, ready for some new water-cooler chat or simply curious to see if the grass really is greener on the other side.  Oh, we all talk a good game, venting our frustrations with overused phrases like, “That’s it; I’m getting out of here”, and “I can’t take this anymore”, and my personal favorite, “I wish they would just give me a package to leave”.  

Yeah, right. Those of us who have been to the Land of Layoff know that those packages are never as good as we expect them to be. 

When push comes to shove, most of us rarely take action.  We sit back and wait.

I imagine actors preparing for a scene would have similar issues taking action, if it wasn’t for the annoying guy with the clapperboard shouting, “Action!” Maybe we would be more motivated to search for a job if we had an annoying guy with a board shouting at us.  

I’ve always been a fan of periodically applying for jobs as they present themselves – even if I’m perfectly happy with my current situation.  Some think that’s crazy, yet for me it is about self-empowerment.  Just applying for opportunities can give me an energy boost that’s better than any caffeinated beverage.  The upside of taking action is that I feel like I’m in the driver’s seat, in control of my career. 

The added bonus is that occasionally applying for a new job gives me the discipline to keep my resume updated.  If I’m fortunate enough to land even a phone interview, it may confirm my satisfaction with my current job – or show me that there are new companies I might enjoy working at.  Not to mention that it helps me understand my value in the work place.

Note that I’m not so much advocating that we all leave our jobs as I am persuading us to keep our resumes – as well as our interview skills – up to date.   This way we’ll be prepared when we do see a great opportunity, or if the unfortunate pink slip lands on our desk.

It’s easy to buy the new outfit, update the resume and talk a good game.  The hard part is taking action.

Over Networking

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Networking, the fine art of establishing business contacts and/or relationships, is something we’re all familiar with.  We’ve all been told that this is the best and sometimes only way to actually find a job opportunity.  The concept is simple enough, although true networking – really good networking – takes time.  Hard to fit this into a busy schedule, huh?
When I was first starting out, networking was the buzz word.  We talked about it in school. We talked about it at my first job. We talked about it at happy hour.  “Everyone’s doing it; aren’t you?”  I’d play along during these happy hour discussions, nodding in agreement that yes, I did indeed have a vast business network.
Inside, I was panic-stricken.  Honestly I had no idea how to network or exactly what I was supposed to do.  I had the crazy idea that networking was closely related to cruising the club scene to meet guys.  That networking meant walking up to a total stranger – no matter where I was – to introduce myself in an attempt to find out about job opportunities.
Thank goodness I didn’t try this tactic.  At best, I would have appeared to be socially challenged. At worst, well, let’s not go there.
One thing I had going for me is that I’m good at relationship building and staying in touch with people.   As my career progressed, I made a point to periodically call or email past colleagues just to stay in touch.  I thought it was a nice gesture, something that I would have appreciated had the shoe been on the other foot.  Little did I know that I was networking! 
I continue this tried and true tactic even now.  It seems simple to me, staying in touch with people.  It does take some time, but the pay-off is great.  Each week I shoot a couple emails off to former colleagues, just to see how they’re doing.  A no-brainer.  Besides, I really enjoy staying in touch with people.
It’s occurred to me that not everyone is good at this.  Some know what to do, yet just don’t take the time. But there are others who aren’t quite clear on the concept of networking.  Unsure of how to meet people and use connections to look for opportunities, these individuals tend to push themselves too hard in an effort to be productive.   The unfortunate consequence is that they alienate themselves instead of building their network.  They “over-network”.
Case in point:  Met a fellow at an industry event.  I introduced myself – after all, isn’t this what you do at these things? Within seconds of our introductions, he immediately launched into his elevator speech followed by “do you know of any opportunities for me?”
Really?  I just met you! I don’t even remember your name, despite the fact that you’re wearing a name tag.  How would I even know what you’re capable of?  Much less feel like I want to represent you to my colleagues?
This person continues to contact me.  With the same format as the first time we met. And I still don’t know much about him except that his delivery is poor, he doesn’t have any more experience than the first time we met and I honestly feel uncomfortable recommending him to anyone.  
To be clear, I really like helping those who are looking for work.  Truly I do.  But I can’t recommend you if we haven’t established – over time – a relationship, one that lets me get a feel for your qualifications, not to mention your abilities.  Remember, you’re asking me to put my reputation on the line and recommend you to my colleagues.  
With social media it’s easy and tempting to “over-network”, to try and align yourself with as many contacts as possible.  Besides, we’ve all been told that the only way to find a job these days is through networking.  That must mean connect with as many people as possible, whether you know them or not, right?  How could this be a bad thing?
In my experience, networking has to happen sort of organically over time and through a variety of sources.  Great networking comes from those who know us best, not people we meet randomly.  When we are reaching out to someone new, it’s best to have a mutual friend or colleague vouch for us.
In the wrong hands, networking apparently becomes toxic. A bit sad. Sort of creepy.   But done right, it works wonders.
© Tami Cannizzaro 2012 All Rights Reserved