Weekend Getaway

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Tahoe mountain pic

We always talk about “getting away for a weekend”.  Talk, talk, talk – we talk A LOT about it.  Yet it’s something Hubby and I seldom do.

There’s always a million little reasons why we can’t or shouldn’t or don’t take a weekend.  Work. Money. Family. Work.  I could just type “work” over and over again as the real reason behind our inability to get away.  It’s just too difficult to power down for even a few days.  And even more difficult to face the hundreds of emails when we return.

Fed up, I finally decided to do something other than talking about a long weekend.  Hubby had a birthday coming up and I planned a weekend out-of-town as an early present.

It was hard to lock in a date, agree to power down for the weekend and just relax.  Fear crept in as the date approached with both of us wondering how we would ever get our work done.

What if someone needs us? How long would it take us to bounce back? Would we actually turn-off and relax? COULD we actually do it? Or had we forgotten how to enjoy a few days of R&R?

I had the added stress of leaving mom, who had taken a nasty tumble and was not yet 100%.   Even the doctor reassured me she would be fine.

Well, let me tell you something. It was just like riding a bike. We remembered how to relax.  And it was awesome!

Aside from taking tons of photos and sharing on social media, that was it.  No work emails.

Going into this, we had a few goals.  Play golf.  Hike.  Sit on the side of a mountain and watch the world go by.

Check, check and check.

The best part?  We were able to clear out minds for a few days and let other thoughts enter. 

Sitting on a rock on the side of a mountain, we talked and listened to birds and just enjoyed the breathtaking view.  With undivided attention we shared thoughts and ideas with each other in the calm of the day and both came away inspired, actually ready to get back to work.

Weekend getaways should be required for everyone, whether you’re working or looking for work.  They can bring out the best in a person; mainly a fresh perspective.

Look at me; I got this blog post out of it.

Biking, Hiking and BBQs Oh My! But What About the Job Search?

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Beach pic

June is finally here and you know what that means: summer vacation!

As Pink Floyd so famously sang, “No more pencils, no more books! No more teachers dirty looks!”

I remember that euphoric feeling as the last bell rang for the year or in college when I finished my last final exam.  It was awesome knowing I had at least two months of relaxation without school responsibilities.

Too bad that all ends when we start our careers and enter the “real world”.

No more summer vacations.  If we’re lucky, we can bookend the summer with long weekends at Memorial Day and Labor Day. Depending on how the calendar falls we may get a third long weekend at Fourth of July.

Hardly the freedom-fest summers of our youth.

It’s been ages since I was in school yet for some reason at this time of year I still find myself wanting to slow down from work and take a step back.   With the sun finally shining I guess I’m ready to come out of hibernation.

Or more appropriately, I’m ready to get up from my desk, longing for a respite from the busy go-go-go lifestyle that has taken over.

Yes, I want to run away from it all. Even if only for a little while.

My mind plays tricks on me, suddenly forgetting all the things on my to-do list.  Knowing that we have a couple of trips planned, Vacation Brain tries to push Work Brain out of the way weeks before it’s time to leave.

I play all sorts of games to remain focused on career, networking, finding my next opportunity and the like, yet it seems in vain. There are simply too many distractions.

The swimming pool is calling me to come outside.  Friends in the teaching profession have free time to play.  Family wants to come to visit. Tons of summer festivals and events.  Biking, hiking, and BBQ’s, oh my!

Even the news is conspiring against me, telling me summer is a terrible time to look for a new job, that hiring tends to decrease over the summer as managers take vacations and a slew of other reasons.  My mind says this sounds reasonable.

Vacation Brain says, “Go ahead and give in; don’t do any work for the next couple of months”.

Work Brain knows I’m responsible and forces me back to reality saying “You know better.”   Sometimes I really hate being responsible.

Work Brain is right. We should not give in to the temptation to relax our standards just because it’s summer and vacation is right around the corner.

Especially anyone who is looking for a new job.  Don’t lose your momentum!  Let others drop out of the job search race if they want; that gives you the edge.  Besides, you never know when there might be a new opportunity and you could be the first to see it.

Should you enjoy summer and plan a vacation? Of course! It’s always good to take a short break to rejuvenate.   Just make sure you have a plan for staying on top of your job search strategy rather than dropping out completely.

It’s OK to Take a Break

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Not sure where the time goes.  Suddenly I realized it was time for my twice yearly girls’ weekend, when we all go to a B&B for a few days of crafting, eating, talking, eating, watching chick flicks and – you guessed it –  more eating. These weekends are a great chance to reconnect with good friends who I rarely get to see due to our schedules and distance.

Yet this time, instead of looking forward to the weekend, I found myself frustrated and regretting my decision to attend.  It had nothing to do with seeing my friends.  It was all about my to-do list that was at least a mile long and growing.  In addition, I had no idea what creative project I was going to work on.

Usually I’m eager to pull out my scrapbooking stuff and work on a vacation album.  Not this time.  Disorganized, I hadn’t touched my stuff since the last girls’ weekend six months earlier.  I’d been so busy with work, speaking engagements, volunteering and family, it felt like the energy and creativity had literally been sucked out of me.

I contemplated not going.  I considered bringing my laptop instead of my scrapbooks so I could work on my writing.  I wondered if I could simply hide in one of the bedrooms and catch up on much-needed sleep.  Mostly I just wanted to stay home, convinced that this was the worst possible time for me to leave.

How would I get my writing done?  What would I put in a scrapbook?  Would I even have anything fun to talk about with my friends? 

“But you always love to go,” said Hubby.  “Think of the fun you’ll have once you are there.”  Easy for you to say, I thought to myself as I reluctantly packed my things.  My only thought was that I was wasting valuable time I could spend at my computer.

To be completely honest, recently I had begun to feel like my work and writing was suffering.  Maybe it was just too much to do; maybe I had “lost my touch”.  It even crossed my mind that maybe I had become lazy.  Whatever was happening to me, it seemed like a really bad time for me to attend a girls’ weekend of fun.

Or was it?

I had plenty of time to think about this in the car.  Maybe Hubby was right, I thought.  I remembered that I took a break from the job search when I was laid-off, and it turned out to be the right move. Perhaps this situation was similar; maybe I needed a break from everything for a couple days to spend quality creative time with my friends.  I slowly started to relax.

Upon arrival I was greeted by smiles and laughter as my friends all gathered around.  Shoes were replaced by comfortable slippers as we all talked at once, trying to catch up.  Paper, paste, photographs, stickers and all sorts of creativity began as we plugged in the first of many chick flicks.  Food and drinks were abundant, truly the sign of a great gathering.

It took me a bit to shake the creative cobwebs from my head but I managed to get my photos organized and a new scrapbook started.  I enjoyed visiting with my friends and realized how much I value their friendship.

My scrapbook didn’t get finished, although that’s not important.  What matters is that I took a break – mentally and physically – from my normal routine.  Something I should do more often.  The computer, work and everything else can wait.

Remember this story if you find yourself on-edge during a job search.  Sometimes a break – even a short one – can put us back on track.

Naked Thoughts

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Unless I’m in a medically induced coma, turning off my mind so I can relax is next to impossible. My mind is constantly on the go, the ultimate multi-tasker, running rampant as it hops from one thought to the next.   I’m envious of Hubby who seems to have no problem putting his mind to rest. Simply turn on the TV and viola! Instant relaxation. Must be a guy-thing.

As a result, getting away from our daily grind of home, consulting and thinking about new opportunities is very important to me.  Visiting our favorite resort provides me with some relaxation as we spend the majority of our time in a poolside cabana.  This year Hubby suggested that we indulge in a couples massage.  “Come on,” he pleaded. “It will be so relaxing.”   I looked at him like he had sprouted a second head, asking “Uh, have you met me? You know I can’t keep my mind still for five minutes much less an hour”.  Persistence paid off for Hubby as I reluctantly agreed to the extravagance.

I’ve got to give the resort spa credit – I felt a bit like royalty as I indulged in a pre-massage sauna and shower, slipped into a luxurious bathrobe and slippers, then sipped herbal tea in the pre-treatment “relaxation room” while waiting for my massage “therapist”. 

My therapist was very calm, with the softest voice as she escorted me to the massage parlor – I mean “room”.  Thank goodness Hubby was already there; it would have been humiliating if they had mistakenly paired me with someone else.   “What kind of oil would you enjoy?” asked my therapist. “This one promotes balance, this one energy, this one peace…” and the list went on.  I chose “balance” simply because I gagged at the other scents. 

“Relax,” whispered the therapist.  Oh yeah, I thought. Like it’s totally normal to have a stranger rub smelly oil that’s supposed to promote “balance” all over my naked body.  Yes, technically I’m not naked all at one time, but the whole idea of being in a dimly lit room, naked, with candles and incense and other smells, naked, with a stranger rubbing oil on me is just not normal.  Did I mention the part about being naked?  Sure, there’s a sheet, but honestly that little piece of see-through muslin isn’t fooling anyone.

Trying to find my mental “happy place”, I took a deep breath, telling my mind to quiet down and enjoy the moment.  Yet my mind resisted.  How could I quiet my mind with a stranger kneading my butt, which by then was classified as an oil slick by OPEC?  There was so much oil I was afraid I’d have to pay an environmental fine.

Side one finished and my mind was still in high-action mode as I awkwardly tried to flip to my other side without falling off the narrow table.  Attempting to calm my mind and be peaceful, I tried again to go to my “happy place”.  I actually heard Hubby snoring as his therapist kneaded his butt.  Honestly, how can you sleep through this, I thought? I told my mind to listen to the peaceful, soothing music.  It was slow and soft, mainly a flute and some other instruments I couldn’t identify.  Instead of relaxing to the peaceful unidentifiable music, my mind’s thinking, “Who writes this stuff?”  I can’t imagine listening to it on the car radio; highway traffic would come to a standstill since we’d all fall asleep or go insane with the constant chiming and chanting.

Still attempting to find peace during this experience, I tried breathing slowly and deeply, counting sheep, counting backwards from 100, saying “ohm” – anything to calm my busy mind.  This is why I don’t meditate.  My mind is unable to be still for even a nanosecond. 

Finally, peace came.  I was so relaxed, the smell of the oil had become a pleasant aroma rather than an offensive odor, my muscles were enjoying being rubbed and massaged and I was ready to enjoy the rest of my time in the treatment room. 

“Thank you for coming,” the therapist said.  “We’ve left you some water and a treat, and will be waiting for you outside the door.”  What??? Wait, my mind is finally quieted and you’re leaving me? Come back, rub some more oil on me – I promise I won’t wince at the smell! 

Sigh. And just like that my mind woke up again.  I would like to think that my busy mind is brilliant, but I know better. It’s just busy.  At least it’s not naked.

© Tami Cannizzaro 2012 All Rights Reserved