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Ever feel like you’re spinning out of control? That life is controlling you, instead of you taking the lead?

It seems like I always feel that way. Too much to do, not enough time.

This is not a bad thing.  I’ve got so many interests that I could be busy 24/7.  Could be worse; I could have no interests at all and struggle to find ways to fill my days.  Yet I may have too much of a good thing – between work, writing, family, volunteering, exercising and other assorted hobbies, it’s hard to find even a minute to sit back and relax.

It happened again Saturday night, the overwhelming feeling of “must do this, must do that” overtaking me.   

Saturday night used to be “Date Night”.  A sacred time when we were free from work and stress, when we allowed ourselves time to simply have fun.  Unfortunately Hubby and I had forgotten this ritual and again found ourselves, late afternoon on Saturday, with no plans at all for that evening.

Guess we just hoped that something exciting would happen without any forethought on our part.

I tried to calm myself, as I could feel a meltdown coming on.  Hubby was trying his best to get into the spirit of a last-minute date night, even stepping outside to call me on the phone from the backyard to ask me out.

“Humph! Don’t you think it’s kind of late to be asking me out, an hour before you want to leave?”  I cried.  “Do you just assume I’m sitting around waiting for you to call?”

Amazing how easily I reverted back to single-gal mode, huh?

Knowing that we were reaching critical mass and tears were imminent, Hubby came up with a back-up plan that most women love to hear: “Let’s have dinner and go shopping!”   Gotta love Hubby; he sure knows how to make a girl smile.  Food and fashion are always a win with me.

While this was a nice short-term fix, we still have the bigger issue of our lives spinning out of control.  A planner at heart, I know that direction, not intention, determines destination.  Hubby and I made a promise that night to work on planning more fun, rather than waiting for fun to find us.

This is true for careers as well as date nights.

When I was laid-off, I took this to heart and mapped out a plan.  Starting with the end result, I worked backwards to figure out how to accomplish my job search goals.  I even wrote everything down on a grease board.  Sometimes it seems like writing it down makes plans more real.  After all, it doesn’t matter how much you want something to happen – without a plan, chances are you’ll stay put.

Simply intending to work on a job search is not enough. We need to have directiona plan – in order to reach our destination of a job offer.

Even now that Hubby and I are working again we still need to map out our career goals as well as our life goals to make sure they work together in harmony.  Hard to remember this, but we are trying.

Yes, I’ve forgiven Hubby for asking me out at the last-minute.  Although I’m sure next time he’ll remember to plan in advance.

Right, Hubby? Hubby?

About Tami Cannizzaro

A Dallas-based marketer, public relations consultant, motivational speaker and mentor, Tami Cannizzaro found herself facing a minor identity crisis after a layoff. Determined to find the silver lining—after all, there’s always a silver lining—she discovered that there’s humor in what can be an unstable and sometimes frightening situation.

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