My first job outside of babysitting was at McDonalds. It was a dream job for me at that time in my life – a teenager working at a fast-food restaurant, with free meals. Heaven!
My biggest challenge at this job, aside from the fact that I was not even five feet tall and looked like I was twelve, was that I was shy and unsure of myself. McDonalds needed outgoing and confident.
In an attempt to mold me into the model employee, the manager had me stand a good distance back from the register watching for the front door to open. As soon as a customer set one foot in the door, I had to shout, “Welcome to McDonalds! May I take your order?”
While no one was particularly upset with this aggressive approach, I did encounter a few snickers as customers were hoping to actually get inside before being pressured into making a burger decision that could affect the rest of their day.
At my first job out of grad school, I had to learn to become even more decisive and assertive as I took charge of my department.
Neither of these jobs really changed my personality – I actually already had it in me; I just needed the confidence to find my voice.
And find my voice I did. As I gained experience and matured, my personality came out of its shell. Gone is the girl who was too shy to say much in the halls at high school, letting others take the lead; she’s been replaced with a woman who is not afraid to introduce herself to strangers, state her opinions, take charge and make decisions.
Those who know me now think I’ve always been this way, shouting hamburger greetings to customers before they step in the door.
My confident and assertive personality characteristics have served me well in life as well as my career. In fact it’s one of the reasons I am hired.
Yet there are times when I feel pressure to modify my personality – especially at work – in an attempt to match the expectations of others. Those around me want my personality and all that comes with it; they just want it to appear only when it serves them best.
I’ve got to say that this doesn’t work for me. And believe me, I’ve tried. It’s as though what makes me “me” is valued only as long as it can be tweaked
In this day and age it seems like everyone wants a lukewarm personality; one that’s neither hot nor cold, but watered down. More passive than assertive; one that’s always trying to say or do or be what others expect of them.
That’s like walking on eggshells to me, trying to figure out the right words for fear of being received the wrong way. The result? At best, unclear communications; at worst, employees who are afraid of being themselves and showing their true personality.
Why can’t we just be ourselves, with the personality package that the employer wanted in the first place? You know, “Love me, love my personality”?
I started noticing this trend some years ago and hoped it was just the company I was at or possibly a phase. Unfortunately it’s becoming the norm.
Not sure if it’s the result of the millennial generation who never heard the word “no”, with every person receiving praise and a trophy no matter how poorly they performed, or if it’s just our culture evolving because we are too afraid to say what we mean (in an appropriate tone, of course) for fear of being politically “incorrect”.
Whatever it is, I long for the days of direct communication without fear. How great would it be to know that it’s okay to be stern, happy, serious, excited, frustrated, and even, if the situation warrants, mad, at the office?
Like my first job at McDonald’s, it’s time to remove the gloves and allow everyone to show off their true personalities.
Maybe we’d rediscover clear communication if we were allowed to express ourselves. Wouldn’t that be something?
Like Tami, I was terminated once (By my best friend, BTW – he is now on the board of the agency I lead, so I got him back – ha!), but you don’t have to be unemployed to learn something from this book. 
